How To Find Relief In Boredom

It was a drizzly day yesterday, and I remember feeling increasingly frustrated as the day went on, simply because I felt bored and had not done anything productive at all.

I slept in longer than usual and woke up to an empty schedule for the weekend.

Saw some email notifications which I comfortably left in preview mode.

My boys were happily occupied.

The most comfortable couch in the world (in my world that is) greeted my eyes to the pitter patter sound of rain as I walked into the living room.

After a good shower and lunch, I tried to chillax. Chill and relax as they say, but it didn't go too well.

I just felt extremely bored and restless.

And so I ended up doing things; House chores, changing the sheets, arranging the contents in the fridge. Wanting to fill in the free moments with seemingly productive things to do. Wanting to feel busy.

In my mind, I was literally screaming: Why is it just so hard to rest!

Boredom Is Bane For Productivity Addicts

If I were to ask you what do you do for some R&R, I'm certain that all of us will give many different answers. You read, you play video games, you unleash creativity on Canva. Sure, it is completely up to you on how to spend your free time. Yet when spun another way, all these activities can also lead to productivity stress. The reader takes notes, the gamer tries to score, and the artist aims to create her best work for social media. Depending on your mindset, these things can be the complete opposite of resting and relaxing. We have a societal need to be better and faster, which put a damper on any activity that we do purely for leisure of passion, because we cannot see it outside of a ‘working’ frame of mind. When we do not allow our mind to enjoy activities, not as something to be achieved or completed, then we will find it impossible to relax in this age of efficiency.

I was worried that if I didn’t, I would never reach my true potential. I was afraid of looking back and thinking that all my time was wasted idling. I was scared of being a failure and a disappointment - which, as you probably have guessed by now, may just be the trigger to my anxiety attacks.

Why I Struggle With Having Nothing To Do

Google “productivity” and you will be served with 458 million results! Dive in and you will find blogs, websites, apps, op-eds, subreddits, consulting firms, podcasts, and scientific studies devoted to the art of efficiency. I have to admit that I am every bit a chronic perfectionist in my quest to be an overachiever who prides on excellence. I have always instilled a sense of efficiency, fueled by the need to create the best work possible in every task I took upon. Everything I do must be checked at least three times over, metric-ticked and fully completed with no room for amendments. While I find this fulfilling (albeit a tad exhausting!), this is also why I get uncomfortable being bored. Now I look at this obsession with hyper productivity/efficiency/perfectionism as a form of existential crisis. I was not obsessed with dead-set routines because I genuinely wanted to bring results to the table. I was worried that if I didn’t, I would never reach my true potential. I was afraid of looking back and thinking that all my time was wasted idling. I was scared of being a failure and a disappointment - which, as you probably have guessed by now, may just be the trigger to my anxiety attacks.

Accept Downtime As Recharge Time

So, after doing a little research, I discovered that the secret lies with being comfortable with boredom. You may feel like you are wasting time if you are not ticking something off your to-do list. But did you know the opposite is often true? Your most impactful ideas may come in that one moment when you are not distracted or triaging emails. Let your brain relax to refuel your attention and focus. One of the healthy habits I formed in my life was to make a commitment to not look at my phone when I am walking or commuting in order to let myself think freely. You may say that it is boring to just stare into blank space. Or that you are not used to keeping your hands phone-free. I suggest that you give it a try. You may just find it liberating!

Being bored is usually seen something negative, no-excuse behaviour and to be avoided at all costs. However, boredom researchers (yep, there is such a thing) say that being bored can lead to:

1. increased activity and creativity

2. better ability to focus

3. better problem-solving

4. less stress and anxiety, and

5. an enhanced feeling of well-being

Additionally, it has been scientifically-proven that our brains need downtime, too!

At the end of the day, not everything needs a goal or a purpose. Not every gap should be filled with something to do. I make sure I get to enjoy the aroma of a freshly brewed mug of strawberry tea to the warm sunlight that shines on my window. As my partner always say, don’t put off your life for work that can be done tomorrow. Find a moment to get bored and enjoy it. Sometimes, less is most definitely more.

May we always be in a state of calm and good mood, and relish peaceful moments in our everyday!

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Elma is an Organizational Specialist by day and a Mood Scientist by heart. Visit her website.